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ANYBODY WHO SAYS YOU CAN'T EAT POPSICLES FOR BREAKFAST CAN FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF BC THESE FROSTY BOYS HAVE NO ADDED SUGAR SO TECHNICALLY IT'S A SMOOTHIE CHECKMATE BITCH

Have you ever seen the living nightmare mascot for Hamburger Helper? That shit is terrifying. But ya know what's worse than that?

NO SHIT IT'S HOT, IT'S FUCKING SUMMER. Pull yourself together, go find some shade, and kick back with spiked citrus iced tea.

Trying to eat better? START WITH PIZZA. This sweet potato pizza crust has all of the taste and none of the baked, bleached bullshit.

GRAPEFRUIT HOT TODDY AKA HUG IN A MUG AKA DOCTORS ORDERS AKA COLD CRUSHER

We don't need to sell y'all on gravy. This shit sells itself. Gravy is king of the holiday foods but great year-round on biscuits with some wilted greens. If you're lazy, just pour it on some toast.

In case you haven’t been outside lately, summer is here with a goddamn vengeance. Which means it’s burger season. But don’t fire up that rusty ass grill, you’re probably outta propane anyways.