Recipes

Roasted Broccolini Herb Noodles

COLON CANCER AIN'T FUCKING AROUND. You gotta eat more broccoli bc it's like a toothbrush for your asshole. It's way more effective and a HELLUVALOT CHEAPER than a juice cleanse.

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Buffalo Caesar Wrap

Y’all ever fuck around and wrap some food with twine? Can’t explain why but somehow it just makes food taste better. Someone fund the science behind this please.

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Clean Out The Fridge Pasta

Got some less-than-fresh veggies taking up valuable real estate in your fridge? Don’t toss them in the trash, roast those bitches. Just because something’s old doesn’t mean it’s worthless so CALL YOUR GRANDPARENTS.

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Spinach Falafel

If you're like us, you crave falafel regularly but WHO IN THE FUCK has a deep fryer? This recipe's got all the flavor you fancy AND it's a great way to sneak more spinach into your diet.

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Jackfruit Carnitas Tacos

When it comes to something as essential as tacos, don't settle for some soggy sodium shell. Instead try these Jackfruit Carnitas for tacos, burritos, a salad, or just stand over the pot and go to town. NO JUDGEMENT.

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