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We don't need to sell y'all on gravy. This shit sells itself. Gravy is king of the holiday foods but great year-round on biscuits with some wilted greens. If you're lazy, just pour it on some toast.

This holiday season don't just stay warm, PUT A ROARING FUCKING FIREPLACE IN YOUR GUT. BREATHE FIRE. SLAY THE HOLIDAYS. DRINK RESPONSIBLY BITCHES.

You can still eat like a kid because NOSTALGIA ISN'T JUST FOR SHITTY MUSIC

Since you’re probably eating nachos for the big game, sideline the questionable cheese-like product and sub-in our butternut squash queso for a touchdown… or home run… or whatever the fuck sports pun you think is appropriate. Go sports!

Summer is winding down but there’s still some sweet produce left out there. Go grab some goddamn nectarines and make this pasta while you still can, before all-pumpkin-everything season starts.

CHILI VS. QUESO BATTLE IT OUT IN A GODDAMN DELICIOUS DUEL WHERE THE ONLY WINNER IS YOU

You mean to tell me there’s some motherfucker that builds toys in his house on a sheet of ice all year then delivers them in one night and you’re just gonna fucking offer him store-bought cookies?

It’s honestly offensive how good, and dead-simple this recipe is. It’s a simmer and serve. Nothing easier than that. But damnnnn, the results are bigger than the sum of its parts.

Don’t use Halloween as an excuse to count a big ass bag of mediocre candy as a snack. You know damn well that shit is just going to fuck with your stomach. Instead calm your cravings with this coconut caramel dip.

Doesn't matter how much money you got in the bank or what you've got parked in the garage BUT IF YOU DON'T HAVE HOMEMADE FUDGE CHILLIN IN YOUR FRIDGE YOU'RE