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If you’ve never made dumplings before, they can seem intimidating, but we promise you got this shit.

Stop fucking around with canned sodium soup that's tryna pass itself off as chili. You deserve something heartier, packed with protein, and full of fiber that's affordable.

COLON CANCER AIN'T FUCKING AROUND. You gotta eat more broccoli bc it's like a toothbrush for your asshole. It's way more effective and a HELLUVALOT CHEAPER than a juice cleanse.

It’s cold as a motherfucker outside with no end in sight. So why not warm up with a big bowl of this liquid sunshine and start thawing from the inside out?

Have you ever seen the living nightmare mascot for Hamburger Helper? That shit is terrifying. But ya know what's worse than that?

You’re not still fucking with some mayo-soaked pasta salad, right? Because that shit always gets left in the sun for the wasps. Fuck all that. Whip up a bowl of these next level noodles and start spring with SOME GODDAMN RESPECT FOR YOURSELF. 

Whether you’re spending Valentine’s Day with your significant other or your own sexy self, you’ve gotta fucking eat. But skip the expensive-ass restaurant and predictable chocolate covered whatever.

Once a year people do this weird thing and get all fucking jazzed about eating a big ass bird that looks like a poor-man’s peacock. If turkey really tasted that good then everyone would be cooking those fuckers year round.