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Last minute holiday shopping? FUCK ALL THAT NOISE. Why don’t you stay home and celebrate in style with some of these spicy sweet bastards?

Eggplant is abundant as fuck this time of year so you can buy them on the cheap. Not sure what the hell to do with an eggplant? Grab that Grimace-looking son of a bitch and roast the shit out of it so you can whip together this dope dip.

If you’ve never had a pierogi then you have our condolences. Sure these dumpling-ravioli hybrids take some fuckin effort to make but good shit takes time.

For the rest of us who enjoy stuffing that WASN’T cooked in a bird’s ass, carb load up with our Sourdough Herb Stuffing. You’ll need your energy to flip the table when Nana starts in on the election.

Don't wait for some rando to roll thru in musical van so that you can get an ice cream sandwich. 

You mean to tell me there’s some motherfucker that builds toys in his house on a sheet of ice all year then delivers them in one night and you’re just gonna fucking offer him store-bought cookies?